real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
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