office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize
