Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Randomize
