MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
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