you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
