ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize
