are you so shy because you have an std?
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
Randomize