He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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