And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
Randomize
