I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
Randomize