I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Randomize
