i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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