I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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