I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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