I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
