sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
Randomize
