careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize