people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
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