The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
My cat gives me a boner
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
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