I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
Randomize
