just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
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