Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
