There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
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