I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
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