i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
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