Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
i out mim tonsoeep
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