Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
Randomize
