i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize
