oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
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