Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
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