he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize