It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
Randomize
