the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Randomize
