So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
Randomize
