he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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