if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Randomize
