she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
Randomize