Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize