Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
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