I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Someone signed my nipple.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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