She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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