Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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