We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
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