I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
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