i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
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