I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
you traded sex for a burrito?
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
Randomize
