have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Telling her that my penis is called megatron was not a good idea for a first date.
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Randomize
