Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
he puts the penis in happiness.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
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