i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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