I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
Why are your pants in the freezer?
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Randomize