He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
Randomize