So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
Randomize